Nicholas Gerlach: The Exclusive One on One Interview with Himself, the Worst Interview of All Time

Cult Status:

Interviewer Nick: You did a lot of stupid stuff in 2021, like starting a cult. What inspired you to start your own religion?

Hot Nick: It’s not a religion, it’s a marketing start up.

Interviewer Nick: Oh….ok. I know you try to keep busy so people don’t ask you to hang out. What other stupid stuff did you do last year?

Hot Nick: Well, I co-hosted the World Saving Podcast with Andy Frasco a bunch of times and went on a national tour opening for him last fall.

Interviewer Nick: The guy from the Dance Party on Twitch?

Hot Nick: Yes. That’s him and the Dance Party is defintely what he is primarily known for as an artist. It’s

his magnum opus, I guess you could say. He’s doing that at Cervantes later this month if you wanna go.

Interviewer Nick: I’m good on that. I’m opening for Menert that weekend anyways in Fort Collins. Anyways…back to you. Touring during a pandemic seems like a lot. Do you have anything to show for it for once, or was this just another meaningless pursuit that will lead to nothing?

Hot Nick: Are you taking a shot at me?

Interviewer Nick: Why would I do that? You are literally me, my favorite person in the world. Just answer the question. Do you have anything to show for it or not?

Hot Nick: Actually yes, I made a live album. It’s called “Nick Gerlach, The Musical!”. It’s on my Bandcamp.
Interviewer Nick: What is it?

Hot Nick: Well…I just said it’s a live album, so it’s a LIVE ALBUM, NICK. More specifically, It’s a retrospective look back at the fall of 2021, the greatest year of our lives.

Interviewer Nick: Oh

Hot Nick: Yeah…..

**awkward silence for like….a while**

Hot Nick: Is that all? I have a lot of TV to watch. Yellowstone just wrapped up their 4th season and I gotta binge that to get my Costner fix.

Interviewer Nick: Yeah. Who’s the British guy on the album?

Hot Nick: That’s Jeff Anderson. He’s the AI narrator I use to help guide people through my set. He’s very helpful and very polite. He’s not threatening or creepy at all. I want to be sure that people know that he’s not threatening or creepy, no matter how they feel. I’ll be the one who decides what’s creepy and threatening around here and it’s not Jeff Anderson, so don’t even go there.

Interviewer Nick: ………ok…..uh….moving on…anything else you would like to add?

Hot Nick: Yeah. I would like people to join my cult. It’s chill. There’s only like 20 rules and there’s merch. If you want to see reviews and learn about the cult, Click here. Ok goodbye. I’m done with this now.

Interviewer Nick: Ok Bye…see you in the mirror tomorrow morning for our daily routine of questioning every decision we’ve ever made in our life that brought us to this point and also wondering how we still look so young and hot after all these years in the music industry.

Hot Nick: I said I’m done with this now.